#sorry im really complainy lately

[brandileigh2003]

I'm not looking forward to 8 hours in car and then non child proof house with special needs kid who's been having a rough couple of weeks.

With in laws where I flip a coin whether they're going to be assholes or not.

And I'm still sick with a not so fun new... I don't know what to call it. Not necessarily side effect. Or complication. But. It's freaking embarrassing.

(ha! Tumblr goes... You've reached 30 tags. So write in your post. Not in tags. It's not the p.s.s.s.s. that you used to write to your best friend 😂)

[nexus-nebulae]

can i please have one day where my health isn't absolute shit

[ariyadaivaris]

- i didnt realize that jiro had already moved on to nxt...well not "moved on" of course but hang on who the FUCK wore a critrole tshirt to 205 live. who are you. WHO ARE YOU. I HATE YOU. IM GOING TO BITE YOU

- i dont wanna watch thisss i already have never felt so indifferent to a new wrestler in my life. this guy is nothing to me and sunil is going to lose to him for no reason. i hate this...i just. i don't care how inevitably talented/whatever these new recruits are really. there's just nothing there! there's not a story there's just the wrestling which everyone marketing 205 has always mistakenly taken as it appeal. and it's just not! it's not at all. why was lince teamed with john morrison whadda hale.........where's gran my friend gran :( for that matter why isn't lhp on 205 still i miss them so so much. also riddle should still be killed

- oh do we have a 20 minute main event? where tony and ariya win which i know because i accidentally checked twitter? worm? maybe this will be something

- uhm i should say something about the new guy whos name i forgot but i dont want to. i don't like the look of him. the mma background the leopard print the demeanor it all feels Bad or at least like Something I've Seen Before That Should Be Taken As A Red Flag and maybe that is unfair but i don't care enough to form another opinion. c'est la vie as they say

- sorry i feel like i am complainier than usual which given how late i am to boot is not really great. i would say i haven't been doing well (which i haven't, in fairness, though when am i ever doing well lol) but to be honest i just really, really, REALLY have not wanted to watch. i don't know exactly why, knowing tony and ariya actually win this match should be a hook for me, but it's a combination of the bogus debut match and the...having to expend energy being excited about gold standie match. i know it doesn't seem like it but it takes me a lot of energy to watch 205, actually. it always has in a weird way. back when i took eight hours to dissect an episode which was a better time really even if i was cringe, to now when i spend even longer just trying to garner the enthusiasm to withstand a show that is just not something i expect things from anymore, that occasionally provides me a foothold regarding the only two characters i think about in depth anymore and that i pounce on in order to compensate for the lack of enthusiasm everywhere else. i am very passionate about 205. it's something i have worked hard to understand and that takes a lot out of me, which enjoying anything usually does. if i'm too excited about something, i can put off engaging with it for months, even years. if 205 wasn't weekly i probably still wouldn't have watched this episode. i just don't have the energy i guess. its...idk. i don't really know what i can do about it besides stop watching but...i don't want to do that either. i dunno :(

- "they know they can rely on each other. they know they can trust one another." feels VERY good to hear that about tony and ariya to be honest. healing <3 i like that for them and i think it's been really genuinely hard earned

- matching black gear. this is all i have wanted. thank you   - okay...okay i hate to say it but ariya's hair has been having a rough time of it lately huh! it happens to everyone...he’ll come back from this

- oh my god wait did tony's flexing taunt actually work...why did [pop punk lead singer newbie] take so long to come back from it. usually when tony does that it just pisses people off and just now tony had to like reassure him out of the corner. i know it was probably him being Too Mad To Speak (especially him mocking it just now) but it's SO funny to think of it as tony actually intimidating someone lol. i think he deserves it. i would LOVE to meet the person successfully unnerved by tony

- support <3

- so bored by this match they're talking about meiko satomura on commentary. listen who can blame them though? i think more people should talk about meiko satomura at all times. she is very cool. who ISN'T boring next to her

- that was...some not-good camera work!!! what else to be expected from the ole double yew double yew

- ARIYA SETTING UP POP PUNK FOR THE MOONSAULT WITH THE KICK TO THE HEAD!!!!!!!!! LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOO THAT RULED. TAG TEAM MOVES

- AWH there's a nice culmination of the last two weeks! tony almost taps and ariya saves him. tony is a lot more willing to tap out than ariya is, quicker to preserve his health, and this time that moment of almost surrendering is used to put him in a worse spot. ariya sees tony about to get fucked over and jumps in. i don't know how to word it entirely, but there's just that sense that they look out for each other! even if tony was going to tap, the only person to take it out on is the person putting him in that position. tony never has to tap if ariya's there to save him. that works out just fine. they care about each other a lot. if you ask me. just my opinion. :) smile

- they're doing more tag team moves teehee ^_^ also that uranage to backstabber RULES that's SO fucking brutal!!!!!!!! no one is surviving that!!!!!!!! gold standard tag team champions NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- ariya's sell of that kick to the head. he's noodle

- tony save awiya...................

- who am i to deny that that springboard move was cool. i'm only human

- TONY SAVE ARIYA..................TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- ARIYA AND TONY WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- i LOVE seeing them develop new tag team moves and i LOVE seeing them point and laugh whenever they beat someone. mischief! mischief and rudeness! i love them. i care gold standard

[abcdosaka]

life update

i’ve been making a lot of random textposts lately but they’re all kinda vague and complainy so i thought i’d write about stuff i’ve done recently

i dyed my hair tips red finally...and it looks really good like better than green actually. i feel like the dye i used will fade fast but i think it will fade to a coral colour which i don’t hate ^^ ill bleach my bangs soon enough but i need to do the math and figure out the ratio of bleach powder to developer

lately i’ve been using twitter through a separate account from my main and i don’t interact with anybody but i like to read threads and whatever its pretty interesting but...there’s so much drama and even though i’m not even involved im already tired of it. i’m pretty much done with tumblr except for this blog but not using twitter anymore either would be really nice...and i never use ig either. one day the only social media apps ill use are texting apps and im looking forward to that. but also how am i gonna get my daily dose of jhope fr my life is kinda lame rn and he makes me happy

i turned my old old 2012 laptop back on so i could play skyrim and its so slow and combat is really hard bc it lags so much which is really unfortunate...but i don’t want to download skyrim onto my new laptop so ill just have to figure out a way to make it faster. i did disk cleanup and defragmenter and hopefully that helps. i think if i allocate more ram to graphics it might be better (or something like that i dont rly remember but ik ur supposed to do it in bios). anyway the laptop is old as fuck and i only used it for games which i barely even play nowadays...although i want to spend my time playing video games instead of social media. i should try to get back into minecraft bc i literally spent like $40 on it... and ttr (i didnt spend money on it but i made a friend like 2 months ago and havent talked to her since....@ her im sorry...)... and i said i wanted to replay portal 2 right

i actually have a shitton of games i own that ive never played. like fucking fez... apparently that game is really good and ive owned it for like 6 years now and i just never played it

also im trying to write a story. ive had the whole story plotted out for like 3 months but ive only started writing it now and i think i have ~800 words? still on chapter 1 or whatever. writing is really hard bc even starting i felt like “oh this is so cringy wow i’m really writing? a FANTASY story??” but tbh so many ppl write fantasy and its fun seeing people with cool powers doing crazy shit. anyways theres hoes out there writing about the most disgusting shit imaginable so i’m trying to convince myself im not cringe and having a hobby like this is a good thing

im not as terrible at it as i thought maybe bc ive been reading a bit lately but idk how to get the patience for it. i just wish i could mentally transfer my ideas onto the page without having to type..like in that saiki k ep where he uses his powers to transfer the manga writer’s idea onto paper without waiting for him to draw it.

i havent really talked to my friends for a while... i guess in actuality its been like a week and a half which is not as bad as it could be but i miss hanging out with my friends in person

i watched the first ep of s2 of bon voyage where they go to hawaii and it made me miss sri lanka so much. like when they landed and walked off the plane i felt so much nostalgia for the air there and just the whole vibe. sri lanka is obvs not the best place in the world but something abt it just hits different. like its just refreshing. i still like toronto tho

id like to go to hawaii one day. and new zealand too. they both seem like really cool places

oh and i made 2 tiktoks that was just like me restoring old white shoes lol. i’m not done there’s still more to do but making tiktoks is so hard and annoying to edit. it makes me not want to continue restoring my shoes since ik im gonna have to film it...

honestly i dont think ive done much else other than study bio and do the pd course... i feel a bit better bc i wrote so much even tho its only technically like 5 things that are notable but still it makes me feel like ive done something lately.